The following is a real life phone conversation between me and the hubs. No husbands were actually harmed in the making of this conversation. Barely.
My phone rings. It’s Kyle on his way home from work and he’d like to know if we need anything from the grocery store. Which is sweet, I KNOW.
Me: Uhhh…diapers and milk. (Always with the milk. Can we just buy a cow, already??)
Kyle: No problem. By the way, I have told you what an amazing woman you are? Every time you walk into a room, my heart skips a beat…you…complete…(sob)…me…
Okay…he might not have said EXACTLY that…probably something more like:
Kyle: No problem. Can you check and see if I need deodorant?
Yeah…that’s more likely what it was. Plus, I guess it’d be weird to see a huge, burly guy sobbing in the diaper aisle. Unless it was the sleep deprived father of a newborn and then that would make total sense.
2 minutes later the phone rings again.
Me: Yeeeeees…(Obviously I’ve seen the caller ID so I know it’s Kyle. I’m about 154% sure what his question will be. And the answer has been the same for about a year.)
Kyle: Uhhh…what size diaper does Trapezoid wear again?
Me: *crickets chirping tumbleweeds blowing silence*
Kyle: I KNOW I can never remember. Is it a 5?
Me: What number is Emmitt Smith?
Me: What was the last year that the Cowboys won the Superbowl?
Me: What was Tom Landry’s last year with the Cowboys?
Me: He wears a size 6. And you’re a jackwagon.
Kyle: Well that hardly seems necessary.
Really Kyle? I’m pretty sure 8 out of 10 moms would disagree.
(I know, I know…he’s a freaking awesome husband. It’s just this ONE thing! ACK!)